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Johnnie Walker, Old Granddad, Jackie Daniels and You

(Neil Sedaka/Howard Greenfield)

You ain't showin' no devotion
The way you're treatin' me.
You go out for the evenin' paper
And you don't come home 'till three,
Or four,
Stumblin' through the door like a wounded pup, ya can't stand up.
Oh how I dread draggin' you to bed
When you had a few.
Fillin' up them ice baths,
Playin' nursemaid too
To Johnnie Walker, Old Grandad, Jackie Daniels and you.

You've been stealin' all of my money
From the cookie jar.
I can see a trail of pennies
Leadin' to the bar,
And grill,
Where ya hide until ya come home tight at broad daylight.
Well it's a doggone shame ya carry my name,
And my baby too.
While most gals have one man,
You have quite a crew,
It's Johnnie Walker, Old Grandad, Jackie Daniels and you.

You're a one man woman honey
But you've got me up-tight.
I'll tell the judge ya stole my money
And he's gonna set you right
In Jail,
And I won't bring the bail for thirty days
'Till ya change your ways.
If you can't choose between me and booze,
This time we're really through.
I'm not gonna pay that alimony
'Cause I intend to sue
Johnnie Walker, Old Grandad, Jackie Daniels and you.

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